To The One Who Broke Your Heart (Part 1)

I know how it is to get your heart broken. It’s painful, confusing, hopeless, and a downright self-worth killer! By the way, I’m no saint either because I also broke other people’s hearts. These acts aren’t done out of spite or revenge, but I believe they happen because hurting people hurt other people.


Side note:

Not all heartbreaks come from a failed romance.

It may come from your parent, friend, boss, or just whoever.

Whatever the case is, this message is for you.


I am a firm believer that every girl deserves to be like that Beautiful Princess in one of those epic love stories in which the prince risks everything to win her heart, and be her champion! I also believe all men can be that Prince - a man who will lead, protect, provide and love her princess. What I’m talking about is not an illusion. It’s the truth and it lies in the inner recesses of our being. (If you need more convincing, I urge you to read “Wild at Heart” for men and “Captivating” for women by John Eldredge, as well as “Fight” by Craig Groeschel). If you want to be that Prince or Princess… All you have to do is tell yourself that.

Every Heartbreak Leads To A Breakthrough!

Let me describe to you how this so called breakthrough will happen. These are basically stages on how people heal from bleeding broken hearts.


1. Grief

This is the time when you feel different kinds of emotions. It’s very confusing because there will be jolts of hope that you’ll get back together, to nights wherein you’ll drown yourself in misery, cry in front of your most trusted friends or lock yourself inside your room.


The first stage is totally tiring because your emotions fluctuate so much that you actually won’t know what to feel anymore. And you also temporarily stop from becoming a properly functioning human being.


I have learned in NLP (Neuro-linguistic programming) that our brains work like a hard drive- 1000 Terabytes worth of memory. It usually responds to a high emotional event. That’s why when you remember about your ex, you usually think about your happy times or that dreadful moment when he/she broke your heart!


The grieving stage totally sucks, but it something we need to go through in order to get healed. Don’t worry, breakthrough is coming!


2. Grudge

This is where the blame game happens! You get mad at yourself and then start thinking about what ifs. What if you were extra patient, what if you were less jealous, and then you eventually shift to I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!

You get frustrated with small things, with people, work, even happy couples that you see.

This stage is very dangerous because most people get stuck here for a looooong time. They usually don’t show any angry behavior, but they’re boiling inside.

Tip: During this stage, talk to trustworthy people who could help you move forward, or be a part of a connect group in church.

Honestly, you need big courage to overcome this stage! You have to really want that joy that comes from having a healed heart! Don’t worry, breakthrough is coming!


3. Gratitude

So many people say that you need to forgive in order to get healed. Yes, that’s true, but IT IS NOT EASY!

I have a friend who’s world collapsed when her ex broke up with her, but when she started becoming thankful for the things she learned from her ex, true healing started to happen. Today, she is happy with her prince charming!

Gratitude helps you heal. It’s when you cherish all the good memories, learn from them, start moving forward, and then just simply start thanking the person who broke your heart telling them that life could actually be better without them.

This is the season when all good things, start to slowly happen! Enjoy it!

Gratitude opens you up to grace. Grace brings you breakthrough!

The dictionary defines breakthrough as:

[breyk-throo] -an act or instance of removing or surpassing an obstruction or restriction; the overcoming of a stalemate

Breakthrough is when good things happen in your life. It is an indescribable feeling. A moment wherein you know that life is already better… and that the best is yet to come!

Breakthrough is here!

I am excited for your breakthrough healing, your breakthrough happiness, and your breakthrough hope that you can share with others.

Together let’s tell the people who broke our hearts – OUR BREAKTHROUGH IS HERE!

Something good is about to happen,

JPaul Hernandez

P.S. I want to know what other things you would want to tell your ex. Please share it on the comment box below.

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