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Can Friends Become More Than Friends?    

Megan wraps her fingers tightly around the leather handle of her black handbag as she laughs at the goofy outfit that her friend, John, tried out in the fitting room. She’s accompanying him as he buys new clothes for work. Afterwards they have dinner, meet up with their other friends, and then go home. It was a fun day!

You are probably thinking that they’re such a sweet couple that would give you butterflies in your stomach, but no… they’re not. The two of them aren’t even best friends! They’re just “friends.”

They’ve been friends since they were teenagers, and both of them have seen each other fall in-love with other people through the years.

After years of being friends, they don’t get tired of each other’s antics. John and Megan are always there for each other. But, no matter how much other people try to pair them together, they aren’t affected whatsoever.

What do you think? Can their friendship evolve into something “more than friends?”

Are you in the same situation? Or do you know someone who is in a very deep friendship with someone that they are stuck in the “friendzone” and it seems like they can never get out of it anymore?

Here are the reasons that could be keeping friends to fall for each other.

  1. Familiarity – Some people have been friends for such a long time already that they know so many things, or maybe even too many things about each other. They think that because they’ve been friends for such a long time that having a spark is devastatingly impossible.

  1. Friendship code – Some men and women who have been friends for eternity could possibly know each other’s friends, or probably they belong to the same group of friends. This situation has become a peaceful status quo that means rocking the boat could mess up the entire group completely.

  1. Fear – Some men and women have been friends while trying to hide the sliver of feelings and attraction they have for the other. They are just so afraid to act on it, especially if you are the girl, or are friends with the ex. Also maybe their friendship is so amazing that letting it cook to a romantic relationship might destroy it if ever they break-up, regardless of how close friends they were prior.

On the other side of this argument, there are people who didn’t start out as immediately liking each other romantically. Somehow the magic just happens and they fall for each other.

For example, my friends Antonio and Angelica were classmates in college. Antonio immediately found Angelica attractive but didn’t pursue her because he was focusing on other things. While, Angelica seemed uninterested in him, anyway.

As they spent more than 8 hours in class together everyday, their friendship grew and their attraction was reaching a boiling point, which was about to blow up into affection for each other.

Antonio told me that Angelica made the first move (of course, we know he’s lying). Eventually, Antonio found the courage to tell her about his feelings for her and he started courting her.

On their 10th year of being together, they got swept off of each other’s feet once again when they married each other.

Today, they are living their “happily ever after” which all started with their friendship.

So, now, I ask you: how do you know if you can be more than friends? I gathered 3 ways of determining if it’s right to make a move on your friend.

  1. Attention – You’re always finding ways to talk to this friend of yours, or if there are times that you can’t wait to see or talk to your friend because you want to know how their day went by. Also, you give more attention to your “special friend” compared to your other friends.

  1. Awkward attraction – You subconsciously invade your friends personal space, for example, when you are walking and you feel that the skin of your arms bump into or rub against each others’ but you don’t mind it. Or you casually touch each other’s hair, face, etc. and not be“touchy” or be intimidated when they touch you.

NOTE: If you are not attracted to each other, you won’t invade each other’s personal space.

  1. Acceptance – No matter what the past of you friend is, no matter what he or she is going through in life, it doesn’t affect how you treat them or act around them. If you can still adore and look up to someone no matter what that person is like, or who he or she was, it means that you have unconditionally accepted that person in your life.

The biggest shocker is if you know the juiciest details in this person’s life, and you still want to spend the rest of your life with him or her, that means whatever you are feeling inside is real.

There are people who are frustrated because they can’t seem to find their one true love. But you know what? Sometimes the problem is they are looking too hard in the wrong places, so instead all they find are the wrong people.

Sometimes the perfect person for you is just in front of you. Maybe you’re taking the most wonderful person in your life for granted.

Friend, make love happen. Tama na ang taguan ng feelings.

The Best Is Yet To Come,

JPaul Hernandez

P.S. Do you really want to find your one true love? It’s time for you to sign up at Bo Sanchez’s One True Love Club. Just click the icon below.

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